SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/keithverescpa/ Jn 8:12 I am the light of the world, says the Lord; whoever follows me will have the light of life.
Mars and Venus. How far apart are they, really?
I mean, I remember the third-grade acronym clarifying the proper order of the third rock and our neighboring planets: Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto.
The way I recall it is: My Very Excellent Mother Just Served Us Nine Potatoes.
Yes, POTATOES. Although I always said pickles in my own head…'cause I love pickles. I digress.
Potatoes or pickles belie the point…the P in the abbreviation stands for Pluto because it is a planet. Oh yes, it is, ding dang it!
That's what I was taught, it's what I believe, and I did my flippity floppity seventh-grade science fair project on it so, I've got skin in this game, a'ight? Pluto = Planet, PERIOD people.
You know who decided Pluto was no longer relevant enough to hold planet status -- just because she's a little smaller than the other overgrown spheres in our solar system? Astronomer Michael E. Brown, that's who. Hmpf.
Sure, a dude made that call. Did anyone bother to consult us gals before demoting poor little Pluto to Neptune's sidekick?
Just because Pluto's petite doesn't mean she should be kicked to the celestial curb. I mean, she's got a moon, for goodness sakes! Grrr.
Which brings me back to my original question.
According to spacedictionary.org, they are 74,402,987 miles apart. That's 119,740,000 kilometers for those keeping score in the metric system. Oh, that's another column for another day, folks. Ahem.
From where I sit, there's an entire earth and a whole buncha galaxy between Mars and Venus. Yet, it's not enough.
That is to say to Dr. John Gray, author of the book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex" - um, you're wrong, pal, just like the Pluto killers.
Here's why: While hugely different, they're still too similar for the gender comparison. It should've probably been Mars and, at least Jupiter, you feel me?
Of course you don't, you're from Mars and I'm from Jupiter. Duh.
Let me help bridge this cosmos-plus between us:
No, we're never going to stop babying the children, no matter how old they get or how far away they move. NEVER. So, please for the love of all that is holy, stop asking and expecting us to.
Yes, we do have to watch the "Christmas in July" marathon on the Hallmark channel. But, to be fair to you Martians, you can use all the DVR space you want for "Live PD." We promise not to get mad, even if you need to wipe out our favorite episode of "Sex & the City."
Yes, we ARE going to cry when we drop our children off at daycare, kindergarten, camp, and college. Every fall semester and post-Christmas break for that last one, too. Deal with it. We, in turn, will pretend to understand when you won't cry about that but WILL if the paint on your new truck gets chipped.
Yes, we occasionally need to buy undergarments. Might we gently suggest you do likewise, since yours look like a piece of Swiss cheese both Tom AND Jerry have gnawed their way through?
Look, we get it that we don't get it. We just want you to, too, Capisce? We do kinda like you. I mean, after all, we ARE part of the same solar system.
Let's not give Marvin the Martian any ammunition for obliterating earth to improve his view of Venus, 'kay?
Kimerer is a Tribune Chronicle columnist originally from the Jupiter's big red blotch & reachable via www.patriciakimerer.com
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/keithverescpa/ Ps 19: Lord, you have the words of everlasting life. Lk 8:15 Blessed are they who have kept the word with a generous heart and yield a harvest through perseverance.
I'm not sure which fast food chain mascot I wronged in another lifetime ... but I'm certainly paying for it at the first window in this one.
You may or may not recall the unpleasantness I experienced at:
-an area Burger King (impossible-to-mess-up burger & fries order that got totally obliterated followed by an admonishment by the teenage 'manager' when I tried to get what I actually paid for)
-a Buffalo-based KFC (a cashier so rude my kid nearly clobbered her)
-a nearby Wendy's (a flippant young man who sent me a single finger salute when i inquired about whether or not he washed his hands before touching my food after I witnessed him petting the dog in the car ahead of me)
Sigh. And SHUDDER.
Add Taco Bell to the snack shacks that bite back. Hmpf.
As I completed my order at "The Border" the other evening (having had to correct it thrice before it was right), I was asked if I wanted any sauce. The orderee chirped out a list of options.
"I'll just take a few packets of the mild, please."
"NO MILD!" she screamed and I thought, "Well, clearly."
I found it so ironic that a lack of less spicy sauce made her so hot? Hmm.
Folks, this drive-through of the third rock is far too short to go scorching mad over something so harmless and insipid, you dig? Let's all try harder to add more mild sauce to that big taco known as life.
I mean, after all, I for one sure don't want to end up in that big, habenero and ghost pepper-filled fire pit at the end of the trip, Capisce?
#BeMild #StayCalm #BeKind #Pray #Peace
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/keithverescpa/ Mt 13: 1 The seed is the word of God, Christ is the sower; all who come to him will live for ever.
I think it's kind of funny. Ironic, really. And oh-so-validating for soft-skill drippin', right-brainers like me.
Suddenly --and I'm being ironic, BT Dubs-- the business world has embraced the philosophy that, what makes a great leader is essentially the identical criteria for what makes a pretty decent human.
Guess what? Neither requires an ivy-league education. They aren't impacted by socioeconomic status or political party affiliation. They have ZERO to do with race, gender, ethnicity, or age.
In fact, most of the qualifiers are things our parents, Mister Rogers, and Captain Kangaroo taught us.
Come to think of it, that's a group of pretty great leaders, right there. And yes, I realize I am dating myself with two of these references. I digress.
According to the Center for Creative Leadership's 2019 list www.ccl.org/, these are the traits of a great leader:
I don't know about you, but except for perhaps, the ability to delegate (and if we're honest, that's just a variation on "take turns"), this is all preschool final exam stuff, no?
Add kindness and compassion and you've got yourself a list of GOLDEN RULES to live and lead by. And "Oh, The Places You Will Go" if you follow them.
You may just lead your friends, fam, and team to some pretty terrific results during the process, Capisce?
#BeKind #SpeakWell #BeHonest #Encourage #Love #Pray #Peace
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/keithverescpa/ Jn 14:23 Whoever loves me will keep my word, and my Father will love him and we will come to him.
Ah the #FaceApp conundrum. It's got folks in a bit of a tizzy now, hasn't it?
You know who probably is least affected? Us old folks.
Speaking for the "slightly beyond middle aged" set, there are three main reasons many of us may not have downloaded that age filtering app.
Reason #1: We're old and slow. We simply didn't get around to it yet and once we did, we saw all the hubbub of concern and thought twice for once.
Reason #2: We're not in any hurry to add more wrinkles and age spots to our faces; they're appearing fast enough, thank you very much.
Reason #3: We're pretty sure between the mirror and our parents/grandparents/aunts/uncles, etc. we've got a good idea of what OLD AGE looks like...and frankly. we'll just be darned glad to get there, Capisce?
Now, the elder statesmen and women a generation or more older than we, well, they simply don't engage in such nonsense. And even if they did, this wouldn't be something that either interests or entertains them. By this point in life, their brains are simply wiser and sharper than those (possibly sinister) forces unleashing the #FaceApp onto humanity.
And here's one totally unrelated Cybersecurity argument for NOT downloading #FaceApp: nothing is ever a surprise these days.
From learning your unborn baby's gender to skipping the actual cooking part of pot-roast taking an hours-long oven hibernation to no longer having to listenfor the final "perk" in the peculator (indicating the coffee was completely brewed) to rejecting the notion of toughing it out through an entire film or novel to discover how it ends. We are simply unwilling to tolerate waiting for these things (and so many more) today.
Heck, even hanging out for the five-minutes it took a Polaroid to develop from start to finish would not necessarily hold the attention of the average homosapien in 2019.
No, today, we have reveal parties BEFORE our children's births (having interrogated our OB/GYN's) ... we cram huge meat slabs (and whatever else we can fit) into Insta-pots and get meals (that took our poor mothers a week to plan and create!) back in like, eight minutes ... we brew K-Cups in seconds ... we troll the Internet to find out the end of a book, a movie, a TV series ... or a celebrity marriage. You get the gist. WE NEED IT & NOW!
Gosh, we all went and got ourselves into a big old hurry (as "Brooks" from "Shawshank Redemption" would say) sometime over the course of the past millennium or so, didn't we? Sigh.
Let's all slow down. Enjoy the scenery a bit. I'm all for technology and, in the interest of full disclosure, couldn't function without K-Cups.
But the point is, the ride will be over far too soon, anyway; get your admission's worth...and be grateful for every stop along the journey, you dig?
#SlowDown #BePatient #BeThankful #Pray #Peace
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/keithverescpa/ Ps 63: Tell us Mary, what did you see on the way? I saw the glory of the risen Christ, I saw his empty tomb.
If you know me at all, you know that PK's got a few…well, um, let's just call them by their proper monikers, shall we? They are my obsessions.
Hey, we've all got our stuff. Don't pretend you're immune. At least I own it. Whatever.
Anywho, said fixations include but are not necessarily limited to:
-The boy. I know, quite a shocker; my kid tops the list. #Duh
-La famiglia. That amazing kid came from somewhere, right?
-Faith. I'm a card-carrying member of the Holy Trinity fan club, you dig? If you aren't already acquainted, you might want to check 'em out; they're pretty cool.
-Donut House Chocolate-Glazed Doughnut k-cup coffee with a generous dollop of a mixture of the hazelnut and French vanilla Sugar Free Coffee Mate© flavors. Not sure why vanilla's always French but, either way; YUM. And proof that the higher power not only exists, but He's got great taste, too.
-Sunshine. All.The.Sunshine. All.The.Time. Secondary reference: laughter.
-Twenty-One Pilots: the Grammy-winning Columbus-based band with sage, inspirational, and witty lyricism and a wickedly fabulous sound meshing rock, rap, even a hint of bluesy gospel. Don't listen to 'em? I feel sad for you. Seriously.
-The Real Housewives. I take no pride in that admission, BT dubs.
-"Stranger Things (ST)". I touched on this last week, but realize many have nary a clue about the Netflix series. Our pals at Wikipedia offer the following synopsis (my two-cents are added accordingly):
ST is an American science fiction horror web television series created, written, and directed by the Duffer Brothers. Set in the fictional town of Hawkins, Indiana, in November 1983, the first season focuses the disappearance of a young boy amid supernatural events, including the appearance of a girl with psychokinetic abilities named Eleven who helps in the search.
The second season, set one year later, deals with the characters' attempts to return to normality in the aftermath of season one. "ST 3" occurs in July 1985 and continues to explore all that was totally tubular about the 1980s (music, clothing, arcade games), as well as to glimpse deeper into the existence of an alternative, scary reality directly opposite ours.
It appears to be made possible through some sort of time continuum and is often referred to as "The Upside Down". Much effort is spent searching for and opening/closing portals to the counterfeit consciousness.
Guess what? I accidentally located a portal to the Upside Down … it's at the grocery store!
Much like that eerie ecosphere in ST, here's a sampling of the creepiness I encountered at the market:
-A sudden inability to count. As in "12 Items or Less" still means no more than 12 but no one remembers how many fingers and toes that is?
-A vacuum where humanity should reside. Think buggy tailgating; forced faulty, and way-too-fast bagging methods; doors shutting in the faces of babies…and octogenarians. For shame!
-And the granddaddy of 'em all: monsters such as the beast breathing fire (literally) as she simultaneously shifted into reverse, slammed down on the gas, and lit her cigarette; all the while oblivious to the young Mom and two toddlers running out of her path.
Let's all try harder to make reality better for ourselves and our cohabitators, even those fire-swilling "mouth breathers" ignorant to the concept of man's decency to man.
Be kind to each other --- or I'm going to have to go angry Eleven on all y'all, capisce?
Kimerer is a Tribune Chronicle columnist whose passions are harmless; unless you cross her kid, yo. Check out her big '80s 'do and more: www.patriciakimerer.com
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/nicholas-odille-cpa-17408815/ Mt 11:28 Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest.. Mt 12 1:8 My sheep hear my voice, says the Lord, I know them, and they follow me.
I really don't care what other people think about him.
Or what people think about ME for liking him.
In my opinion, Greek musician Yanni is terrific. Yep, just as cool today as he was in the mid 1990s when he performed at "Live at the Acropolis."
So there. BAM.
Some people dismiss him as a passing fancy or untalented.
Others say he's more popular for his looks or being Linda Evans' longtime beau than for his musicianship.
Although I DO wish he would've married Krystle Carrington. I loved them together.
Sigh. I digress.
Haters. Do we really care what they think about Yanni...or us...or ANYTHING, anyway? Nah.
I have always loved Yanni's music and, despite Pop's firm belief that the Romans gave the world every bit of its culture, refinement, and elegance --plus all of the finer aspects of civilized life on the third rock (well, okay, maybe I agree they contributed MOST of it) ...
I still think this composer, keyboardist, pianist, and music producer from Kalamata is pretty terrific. Yes, still.
Yanni's music evokes such emotion and mental imagery; whether it's blithe or tragic; whimsical or edgy, it hits ya right in the feels --- ALL.THE.FEELS.
Yet, what I appreciate most about him is his inspirational messaging. Surprised?
He always encourages, as evidenced by some of his more famous quotes, including:
“Everything great that has ever happened to humanity has begun as a single thought in someone's mind, and if anyone of us is capable of such a thought, then all of us has the same capacity, capability, because we're all the same.”
"Being happy with less is what makes a great human being, not a big house with marble floors, or everyone knowing who you are."
"We're all capable if we have faith and passion."
"The greatest things in life - truth, creativity, imagination, love, kindness, compassion -are already inside us, and they're all free."
So don't let anyone stop you from following your heart in what you know is right: especially when that means standing up for good or believing in yourself or choosing what you know is the honorable path.
Or listening to Yanni, even though he's not at the topping the Billboards --- or because he isn't Italian, Capisce?
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/nicholas-odille-cpa-17408815/ Mt 5:10 Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven.
"I already forgot more than you'll ever learn."
Has your parent ever said this to you? My Pop used to tell us this all the time when we were young; particularly during our latter teen years, I believe?
Eighteen-year-old Patty resented and rejected the notion.
Fifty-one year old Patty is not only certain it's accurate; she's pretty confident that she is part of the sandwich generation containing the soft center, you know what I'm sayin?
As in, my parents are wiser than me AND my kid(s) are smarter than me. Double kablammy whammy. Hmpf times two.
Either way, the humans do have a tendency of being a rather absent-minded lot.
Just look at the way we get amnesia about how far we've come or how much we've accomplished or what abundant wonderfulness we have -- sometimes in a mere matter of seconds!
All it takes for us to waver in self-confidence is a harsh critic. And the simplest setback blinds us to the incredible, breathtaking blessings spilling out all over every single day on the third rock.
All of 'em, you dig?
Don't let some sorry sack sideline you. Don't let past mistakes chain you to yesterday. Don't close your eyes and your heart to the purest, rarest beauty of a baby's smile, a flower in bloom or a rainbow spanning the horizon.
Always remember what's important: your faith, your fam, your health of mind, body and spirit, your willingness to show and receive compassion. Capisce?
And if you forget from time to time, let me know. I'll hook you up with my brilliant folks or my smarty pants kid. They rock.
#BeGrateful #BeKind #BePresent #Pray #Peace
P.S. A big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my father-in-law Don and a belated Happy Birthday to my sweet Jean R. in Warren!! Much love to you both!
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/nicholas-odille-cpa-17408815/ Lk 10: "You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your being, with all your strength, and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself."
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/nicholas-odille-cpa-17408815/ Mk 1:15 The Kingdom of God is at hand: repent and believe in the Gospel. Mt 10: Without cost you have received; without cost you are to give.
A sister by any other name...must be mine, yo.
Poor Gina. The girl hasn't really gone by one solitary name since, gosh, way back when MTV actually played music, I suppose. Shoot, before there even WAS an MTV channel, maybe?
Been a while, anyway.
No, no, as long as I can recall, my sister Gina has had about as many titles as Carrie Bradshaw has designer shoes, you feel me? A LOT.
It started with Gina, of course. Then there were logical variations on the theme: Jean, Gigi, Gina Bina. That's when it morphed off into a whole new direction.
Gina Bina somehow became Gina Beans. Then Gina Beaners. Then just Beaners or sometimes Beans or Bean.
From there, it was Beaner Schnitzel, and, as of late, Beantown. Did I mention I throw in Buckaroo just for good measure many times?
Don't try to figure it out ... especially since, as we were laughing about it the other morning, I sort of did.
That's when I confessed to my big sis: I think this whole sordid mess is really, kinda, my fault. Gulp.
Case in point: my son, Kyle. Whom I readily refer to as Ky, KDK, kiddo, homeslice, Fred, Fernando, Jr., or just Jr. (a nod to his mini-me-ness with his Grandfather), Corrado, mijo, "the fish," Coach Kyle and, probably most regularly, Kyle Kimerer.
Um, yeah, it's me, all right.
But, I have to say, I use all of these handy handles out of deep, deep affection. I'm sure Kyle's got the most 'cuz; well, you do the math. His dad's not far behind with a multitude of nicknames that have been compiled lovingly by his wife over the past 25 years.
I'm sorry, Gina, Kyle and Kerry...and the rest of my fam and friends, for giving all y'all a small identity crisis.
The moral of the story is: If I'm only calling you by a single name, be afraid. Be very afraid.
JK, peeps, pals, compadres, friends! #Family #Faith #Friends #Laugh #Pray #Peace
SPONSOR: www.linkedin.com/in/nicholas-odille-cpa-17408815/ Jn 10:14 I am the good shepherd, says the Lord; I know my sheep, and mine know me.
That's it. Just thanking Him.
Why? Well, I have far too many reasons than I can possibly provide in a single, itemized list. Seriously. If I tried to include everything, I'd invariably and accidentally omit about 1,000 or so items...at the very least.
I mean, I woke up this morning. That's #1.
I can see, hear, taste, feel, smell, think, walk, talk and even sound marginally intelligent on occasion. Well, as earth dwellers go, anyway.
I can laugh and smile and hurt and cry and wonder and imagine and oh, yes, I can love.
I'm really good at that one, if I do say. The hugging part is my particular specialty; ask anyone. #HugsAreAwesome
I've got the best kid, folks, spouse, siblings, relatives, and pals to be found anywhere on this here rock. #Fam
In fact, I hope He's not adding up all my pluses. I'm afraid I've exceeded the total amount of what I actually deserve, you dig? Shhhhh...
Especially considering earlier in the morning I was throwing a little pity party about all the "negatives" in my life.
Sheesh! What a whiny baby I am sometimes!!! #FirstWorldProblems
Then, after a good few rounds of "Poor, Put-Upon PK" nonsense, I'm pretty sure I heard the Holy Ghost whisper in my ear.
I believe his exact words were: "Snap out of it, moron! You are BLESSED, girl!"
And who am I to argue? #Gratitude
Have a wonderful day, friends. Because, even though some stand out more than others, each one offers at least a little somethin' good, Capisce?
#LifeIsGood #GodIsGreat #FocusOnThePositive #Pray #Peace