GRATEFUL GIRL'S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Hello and welcome to national Please Pull Out in Front of Patty Kimerer Day!
This is the inaugural celebration though we've had several dry runs in the past. However, when we hit eclipse #7 --no, not the solar variety-- by lunchtime, I knew today was the day.
The first incident took place as I pulled out of my neighborhood. KABLAM!- some kid from a side street to my left felt it proper to zip out in front of me. It was 6:04AM. There was no one behind me. Like, at all. For miles.
Next came not one but TWO fellas (yes, they were all men to this point) who barreled out in front of me about a quarter mile down the road that is perpendicular to the one which saw offense numero uno.
Jug head number four came from behind. As in, he decided that I wasn't going fast enough on the 45MPH stretch of road I happened onto next. So, he passed the double yellow lane and leapfrogged me on the two lane street. Luckily for both of us, the person now in front of him was doing 32 in said 45MPH zone so we were all just crawling right along. We were like a very small, very angry parade.
Magic number five happened in the grocery store parking lot...and so did six. People, parking lots aren't the human equivalent of the Dodgem video game, okay? THE RULES OF THE ROAD STILL APPLY IN THE PARKING LOT, YO. Maybe open your eyes and look to see if there's anyone driving in the clearly-marked-with-arrows lane you are slicing in half with your would-be bumper car, Capisce?
Oh, and you know those red, octagonal signs with the four letter S-word on them in the parking lot? Yeah, they actually mean the exact same thing as on the road. For heaven's sake, stop at the flippity flipping Stop sign!
Lastly came the elderly couple who scooted ahead of me in the self-serve checkout lane. Did I mention they had 897 items to scan? I mean, I understand you're retired and all and I don't mean to rush you; but I literally have one bag of rice cakes and a small head of lettuce. Help a sister out, no? Um, no.
Sigh. Then it hit me; just like all these cars and shopping carts almost did: if this is today's biggest worry, well then heck, I should be so lucky EVERY day.
So here's looking forward to next year's soiree. And hey, maybe Tuesday will be national Call Patty Kimerer Cruddy Names Day, eh? If people swear at me in foreign languages, we can make it an international celebration!
1 2 Cor 9:6-10 Brothers and sisters: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each must do as already determined, without sadness or compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. Moreover, God is able to make every grace abundant for you, so that in all things, always having all you need, you may have an abundance for every good work. As it is written: He scatters abroad, he gives to the poor; his righteousness endures forever. The one who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will supply and multiply your seed and increase the harvest of your righteousness. JN 12:24-26 Jesus said to his disciples, ...“Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, there will my servant be also. Whoever serves me, the Father will honor.”